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School Jokes - part 6

School jokes, classroom jokes, educational jokes, funny jokes, funny story,

Previous part - 5

School and Classroom Jokes - part 6

51

Teacher: Please tell me something important that didn’t exist fifty years ago.

Student: Me!

52

Why isn’t there any difference between a “fat chance” and a “slim chance”?

53

An English professor wrote the following words on the blackboard: “Woman without her man is nothing.” He then requested that his students punctuate the sentence correctly.

The men wrote: “Woman, without her man, is nothing.” 

The women wrote: “Woman! Without her, man is nothing.”

54

Tracy hadn’t talked to her grandparents for a while and decided she should call and update them.

“I had a terrible time!” she told them. “First off I got tonsillitis, followed by appendicitis and pneumonia. After that, I got rheumatism, and to top it off they gave me hypodermics and inoculations. I thought I would never get through that spelling bee!”

55

Father: You have four Ds and a C on your report card!

Son: I know. I think I concentrated too much on the one subject.

56

Mrs. Oliver asked her class to write a composition on the subject of baseball. “You have thirty minutes to complete it,” she told her class. Sarah handed in her paper after writing for less than a minute.

“You can’t be finished already,” said Mrs. Oliver.

“Yes, I am,” proclaimed Sarah.

Mrs. Oliver looked at her paper and read: “Game called off on account of rain.”

57

Mrs. Davis asked her English class, “Can anyone give me a sentence with a direct object?”

Zach raised his hand and said, “Everyone thinks you are the best teacher in the school.”

“Why, thank you, Zach,” replied Mrs. Davis. “And what is the object?” 

“To get the best grade I can,” said Zach.

58

Teacher: What are the Great Plains? (the student thought them airplanes)

Student: The 747, Concorde, and F-16.

59

Shortly after Christmas vacation, Jasmine came home with a bad report card. Her mother asked her, “What was the trouble?”

Jasmine answered, “Oh, there was no trouble. You know how things are always marked down after the holidays.”

60

A third-grade class went to an art museum. They were instructed to sit and wait until the guide was ready to begin the tour. Two boys, however, decided to explore on their own. They walked down a hallway and entered a room filled with modern art pieces.

“Quick,” said one, “run—before they say we did it!”

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