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Business Jokes – part 7

 

funny jokes, Funny Story, Business Jokes

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Business Jokes – part 7

61

The boss called one of his employees into the office. “Rob,” he said, “you’ve been with the company for six months. You started off in the mail-room. Just one week later, you were promoted to a sales position, and one month after that you were promoted to district sales manager. Just four months later, you were promoted to vice president. Now it’s time for me to retire, and I want you to take over the company. What do you say to that?”

“Thanks,” said the employee.

“Thanks?” the boss replied. “That’s all you can say?”

“Oh, sorry,” the employee said. “Thanks, Dad.”

62

How did the carpenter break his teeth?

He chewed on his nails.

63

A man applied for a job at a construction firm.

“We take turns making the coffee,” said the foreman. “Do you know how to make coffee?”

“I sure do,” said the applicant.

“And can you drive a forklift?”

“Why? Just how big is the coffee maker?”

64

Job seeker: I’m here in reply to your ad for a handyman. Potential employer: And you are handy?

Job seeker: Couldn’t be handier. I live right next door.

65

Herb had spent all afternoon interviewing for a new job. He began by filling out all the papers. The human-resources manager then questioned

him at length about his training and past work experience. Herb then was given a tour of the plant and was introduced to the people he would be working with.

Finally, he was taken to the general manager’s office. The manager rose from his chair, shook his hand, and asked him to sit down. “You seem to be very qualified,” he said, “and we would like you to come work for us. We offer a good insurance plan and other benefits. We will pay you six hundred dollars a week starting today and in three months, we’ll raise it to seven hundred dollars a week. When would you like to start?”

“In three months,” Herb replied.

66

What training do you need to be a garbage collector?

None; you just pick it up as you go along.

67

The new ensign was assigned to submarines, his dream since he was a young boy.

He was trying to impress the master chief with his expertise learned in sub school.

The master chief cut him off quickly and said, “Listen, it’s really simple. Add the number of times we dive to the number of times we surface. Divide that number by two. If the result isn’t an even number, don’t open the hatch.”

68

A man at the construction site was bragging that he was stronger than anyone else. He began making fun of one of the older workmen. After several minutes, the older worker had had enough.

“I’ll bet that I can haul something in a wheelbarrow over to the other building that you won’t be able to wheel back.”

“Okay,” the young man replied. “Let’s see what you’ve got.” The older man reached out and grabbed the wheelbarrow by the handles. Then he looked at the young man and said with a smile, “All right. Get in.”

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